Jersey Shore

admin 1 December, 2017 Comments Off on Jersey Shore
Jersey Shore

Author’s Note: Review originally published June 9, 2013. And why in the world would I post a review for Jersey Shore not just once, but TWICE??! Because MTV is bringing it back, BITCHES!
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Starring – Snooki, JWoww, The Situation, Pauly D, Ron, Sammi “Sweetheart”, Vinny, Deena, Angelina
Developed by SallyAnn Salsano
2009-2012

The show that began my odd passion for all things Snooki and JWoww.

I certainly hear a lot of people talking about how much they DON’T watch Jersey Shore, yet all of these people certainly seem to know a lot about a show they DON’T watch. Well, I seem to be one of the rare people who DO watch this show. And I am not ashamed of this guilty pleasure. I embrace this show like all the other silly reality shows I watch because sometimes People, my brain needs a break from thinking and that is what Jersey Shore does for me, gives me a break from my brain! I do worry, though, about the enormous amount of drinking some of the cast members do. Perhaps some of them should get a gig on Celebrity Rehab?

So what is gay about this show? Well for you gay boys, lots and lots of nakedness from extremely muscular men. All of the men are quite fit and buff and often walk around without a shirt on. For the ladies, well there is JWoww, who has a rocking body and barely wears clothes to cover it. (And yes I admit it, I have the hots for JWoww. Which is odd since usually I don’t find augmented breasts attractive, but that is the power of JWoww’s hotness and even today with a husband and two kids and her looking so damn tired because of the husband and two kids, I still can’t help but faint a little at JWoww’s hotness because that is just how hot and beautiful and sweet that woman is.) And there is Snooki and Deena who do seem to show off their private parts a lot when they have done too much drinking. Also, Snooki and Deena like to make out with each other and other ladies when they have too much booze, and I believe even JWoww and Snooki made out in Season One. (I personally think Snooki and JWoww should just dump their men and date each other already. But that’s just my opinion.)

Fun Fact 1:  There have been two spin-off shows, so far, The Pauly D Project and Snooki and JWoww.

Fun Fact 2: Snooki has said she is bisexual, but will always be in a relationship with a man because she loves penis too much. Obviously she’s never heard of dildos and vibrators that are available at any sex store. Good Vibrations has a fabulous selection that I highly recommend giving a go, Snooki. If you have a decent collection of these, you might not be so keen on having a man around anymore. 😉

Fun Fact 3: And maybe I have secretly wished to hang out one day with Snooki and JWoww because those two women have a fabulously wonderfully loving relationship and are as funny as FUCK and who wouldn’t want to be around all of that laughter and love?! And maybe, just maybe, also, but only maybe, I might want to be near JWoww’s hotness and I think my wife might actually be okay with this, but only because she knows that I love her fabulously fantastic real breasts way too much to be running off to have an affair with JWoww and her fake breasts (although, like I said before, they are the only fake breasts that I have ever found attractive), because, you know, JWoww would so have an affair with me. Hey, a girl can dream, can’t she?! My wife lets me dream because that is how sweet and loving she is to me. Kind of like how JWoww and Snooki are to each other, so no wonder I love these two women so DAMN MUCH!! These women saved me on some dark days with their love and zaniness, so thank you JWoww and Snooki for that. And maybe I should be thanking JWoww’s plastic surgeon too. 😉

Update December 1, 2017 – As Snooki would say, “I’m going to Jersey Shore, BITCH!” And apparently we are all going back to the Jersey Shore, bitches, whether you want to go back or not, because Jersey Shore is coming back in 2018. I’m not sure if I want to go back or not. Oh, who am I kidding? Of course I want to go back! I get to watch more JWoww! And I get to watch more JWoww and Snooki. And maybe them making out again. And maybe Snooki making out with Deena again. You just never know who is going to be making out with who on Jersey Shore. And I’m pretty sure MTV’s demographic on this show is NOT 45 year old lesbians, but too bad! I’m watching it anyway and like before, I am NOT ashamed to admit it. Nope!

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